The Overthinking of Teh Ais

Aloha amigos,

Its 1.21 AM so lets partyyyyyyyy ! ok no, just kidding. Better go to sleep early for sahur and tahajud in the morning.

I just got home an hour ago, we went to Bazar Ramadhan Taiping- I know it sounds lame. Pffthh went to bazar once and you have to write a post? Yes I do.

My parents were busy so this is actually our first time to Bazar this year.Its fun for me, we went around looking things and end up buying fried squid and that famous Teh Tarik Cincau. Hehehe and because we only bought one large cup, we were like blaming each other -who drink more than who?!?

I think my dad drank the most. Heeee

Mr shark did this.

It was such a lovely – simple night.

It reminds me, how I sometimes told people that I dislikes going home. I even told my parents the same thing. Mom wouldn’t like it if she hear this.Hopefully, people wouldn’t misunderstood me.

No , there is nothing wrong about home.  In fact, home is perfect.

Home is where I feel safe and secure. Home is where family is.

And that my dear would be what is wrong with home.

Ever since I decided – yeah I want to pursue medicine – I knew it beginning on that day I should put my mind and my soul into it, my body will follow. I should know what is priority. I should never let emotions overwhelmed me and disturb my focus.

And as a doctor, patients always come first. Family comes later.

If I get too attached to home, it would be difficult not only for me, but for my family as well. The thought that one day family is there, the next there family is not – its troubling me.

I don’t know if this is actually the right thing to do. I’m telling this to them and myself over and over because I wanted them to be mentally prepare- that I have decided to give my all in serving the society so I can’t be there for them all the time.  And they can’t be there for me too.

I mean, we all wanted to be a good daughter/son.

In the future, life only gets harder and harder.

You can count on no one except Allah SWT. And I pray that Allah would protect my family for me, where ever they are, where ever I am, near or far. If it destined that one of us time is up, then put redha in our heart and give us strength to believe in Your plan .

To Allah we belong and to Allah we will return. May Allah grant us guidance and forgiveness.

Dear family, I love home. I do.

That is all for tonight.

Thank you.

Assalamualaikum.

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